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Quickfire With Bartolotta
The seven remaining chefs participated in a TV Guide Quickfire Challenge at M Resort, with Chef Paul Bartolotta of Wynn wielding the guest judge power. It was all about classic TV dinners and giving ‘em a modern interpretation. Chefs drew knives to determine one of seven iconic shows for inspiration (Sopranos, Gilligan’s Island, The Flintstones, Sesame Street, Seinfeld, Cheers and Mash).

Eli commented it smelled like a Jimmy Buffet concert as he prepared his Gilligan’s Island inspired macadamia nut crusted shrimp dish. Mike had never seen Seinfeld (his show). How is that possible? Kevin picked Sopranos and waxed poetic on his grandma’s family-style meals. Michael went with a chicken parmesan dish.

Robin got all giddy over her Sesame Street pick and played off the colors and big eyes with a burger topped with an egg. Bryan made meatloaf with mashed potatoes for his Mash menu, which induced a lot of “mmm” sounds from the judges.

The Ladies Falter, Kevin Shines Again
Padma called on Jennifer and Robin for dishes "up for cancellation." Jennifer’s pea salad underwhelmed judges, while Robin’s burger was dry and "not special." Ouch. The dinners up for syndication came courtesy of Kevin, who nailed a "consistent concept" with his polenta and braised meatballs, with prepared perfectly cooked pears. Bryan’s beautiful roulade was also a big winner, but Kevin took the win. Since immunity is off the table this late in the season game, he won having a version of his winning dish featured in Top Chef’s new frozen food line in cahoots with the online grocery retailer, Schwan’s.

The Elimination Challenge
Next: the seven judges took over Craftsteak at MGM Grand for the Elimination Challenge. Robin was going on and on about how she doesn’t eat much meat (her loss), and the chefs pored over the meat motherlode in the walk-ins piled high with dry aged steaks. Tom arrives on the scene and introduces super cute actress, Natalie Portman.

She claims to be a "huge foodie," then discloses that she’s a vegetarian. Mike brags that of the 60 items on his menu, 20 of them are vegetarian – the cocky comments continue the duration of the show. If we could’ve reached through the TV screen and bitch slapped the spiky haired chef, we would’ve in a heart beat.

Robin has trouble focusing on her menu – she’s all starry-eyed over the fresh garbanzo beans. Jennifer is bitching about getting the baby eggplant instead of the Japanese eggplant. Everyone scrambles to plate their dishes, some falling short on time and missing components and garnishes.

In the dining room, Natalie & Co. are all gussied up, along with Tom, Padma, Gail and Paul ready to get their veg on. Robin’s dish is up first and there’s a salt issue. Padman complains that her ankles are gonna start to swell, but we’re guessing that’s because she’s knocked up. Duh.

Eli’s radish salad and eggplant confit was a hit; "lovely texture" said Gail, and Paul thought the presentation was thoughtful until her stumbled some lavender, which reminded him of sucking on a bar of soap in Provence.

Michael made an asparagus salad with Japanese tomato sashimi and banana polenta, which made Natalie swoon, "This is exciting." One of Nat’s friends proclaimed, "Michael is Picasso."

Jennifer made a charred eggplant with braised fennel and tomato coins. The dish looked disgusting upon presentation and the chef shook like crazy while saucing the plates tableside. Hello, performance anxiety. Natalie felt that is was more like a collection of sides, one of the biggest problems of being a vegetarian.

Mike made roasted leeks with onion jus, baby carrot puree and committed culinary suicide by not including a protein in his dish. Bryan made a barigoule of artichokes with a with confit of shallot, which prompted a semi-naughty conversation that alluded to blow jobs. How risqué, Bravo.

Kevin wasn’t too psyched with his duo of mushroom with smoked kale dish, it was sloppier than he wanted it to be, but everyone raved about its meatiness and manliness. They headed to Bartolotta for dinner where Kevin quips that he didn’t get fat by accident – it was a personal choice. Jennifer’s spirit is clearly broken (just like the sauce she served last week).

Who Won Big?
Back at Judges’ Table, Kevin, Michael and Eli are the fave dishes. Tom commented that Michael’s dish is a reminder of why you always need to keep an open mind and Natalie asked, "Who is his dealer and does he want new clients?"

Gail thought Eli’s dish was utterly beautiful. Kevin’s dish was so flavorful and chock full of texture that it didn’t make anyone miss meat at all. Natalie announced Kevin as the winner, citing his inventiveness and cohesive flavor.

Who Crapped Out?
Michael kicks into bitter mode, bitching that he could’ve made Kevin’s dish in 20 minutes; it was something he would’ve made in his second year of apprenticeship. Go cry us a river, Mr. Sour Grapes. There were no surprises in the bottom three – Robin, Jennifer and Mike. Mike’s leeks were pungent and strong and he skipped over the protein component.

Natch, the all-about-me chef responded to the criticism accordingly with, "Whatever, whatever, what are you going to do?" Robin’s dish was all over the map with nothing to tie it together. Her excuse: Her head was spinning while she was cooking. Mmm…and the dog ate our homework.

Judges’ felt that Jennifer’s dish didn’t reflect two hours of cooking time and it was barely bigger than an amuse bouche. Her hot mess/nervous/self-defeatist/second-guessing behavior was noted by all.

Tom says that throwing the chefs off their game isn’t a bad thing, and Natalie points out that it was a real-life challenge. Thank the culinary gods that the judges’ have finally come to their senses and kicked über-arrogant Mike off.

On the exit, Jennifer grabs him and plants one front and center causing Gail to do a doubletake. Some behind-the-scenes scandal? Now, we just need to get rid of Robin and then we’ll have a dream team competition. We’re stuck with a Top Chef Reunion Dinner next week.