The rows between slot machines are wide enough so that two Rascals can get wedged next to each other and the riders forced to play slots.
— Fake Dispatch (@Fake_Dispatch) December 2, 2012
I wish I has Skrillex with me at parties so that when the conversation lulled, he could come in and blow that sh*t up.
— Fake Dispatch (@Fake_Dispatch) December 2, 2012
If there were a casino game called "22" I'd be pretty good at it.
— Fake Dispatch (@Fake_Dispatch) December 2, 2012
They are holding a marathon in downtown Vegas. Instead of water stations, there are people with matches who re-light runners' cigarettes.
— Fake Dispatch (@Fake_Dispatch) December 3, 2012
Hoover Dam tour guides are required to slightly chuckle at the "dam" jokes that they hear 15,000 times a day.
— Fake Dispatch (@Fake_Dispatch) December 9, 2012


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